Slick Footing Launches ‘Turfgate’ Scandal

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Any close loss is sure to produce some conspiracy theories, and Monday’s defeat has already produced two.

First we had ‘Snapgate,’ which can be chalked up to a barking spider infestation in Dallas.

Now we have ‘Turfgate,’ which is sure to explain why Redskins–and seemingly only Redskins players–were slipping on the turf field on Monday night.

It surely was not because the Cowboys play and practice on turf all the time and the Redskins play and practice on grass.  No, there had to be a more sinister reason, so the media turned to running back Tim Hightower for the inside scoop.

“Man, I hate talking about Monday,” Hightower started off.

Good thing I didn’t bring it up.

“I dunno.  I guess it was bad–I slipped a lot,” he said.  “I can’t speak for anybody else, but for whatever reason, I feel like I had a good warmup, but then, for whatever reason, I fell a couple of times during the game.”

When reminded by ESPN 980’s Chris Russell that he wasn’t the only Redskins player that slipped, he smiled and replied, “Well, that doesn’t make me feel any better.”

He continued: “It’s just one of those things that happens.  It really was frustrating, because I think that we had some opportunities out there early that could’ve changed the outcome of that game.  Unfortunately I wasn’t able to take advantage of them, so it was frustrating.”

Hightower was sure to mention, that going into another dome this week in St. Louis, he would not suffer the same setbacks on the artificial turf.

“I dunno what it is: change my cleats, change my style–whatever it is, I’m gonna get it fixed for this week.”

Sorry this story doesn’t have a juicier ending.  Move along now, nothing to see here, folks.

0 thoughts on “Slick Footing Launches ‘Turfgate’ Scandal

  1. Pingback: The Redskins Blog | Costa, Bowen Settle ‘Barkgate’ Scandal

  2. Pingback: The Redskins Blog | Hail! Finds The Solution To ‘Turfgate’

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